I knew, if I pondered long and hard and deep enough, I would have discovered a legitimate reason for Taylor Swift existing.
Ah, sweet epiphany…
I knew, if I pondered long and hard and deep enough, I would have discovered a legitimate reason for Taylor Swift existing.
Ah, sweet epiphany…

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UPDATE March 11 via People.com:
BETTY WHITE SNL Hosting Date Confirmed
Now that over 480,000 Facebook fans have put in their request, Betty White will finally make an appearance on ‘Saturday Night Live.’
The ‘Golden Girls’ actress will host the show on May 8, WNBC News announced Thursday morning (via PEOPLE). The special Mother’s Day episode will also reunite six former female ‘SNL’ cast members: Tina Fey, Amy Poehler, Molly Shannon, Maya Rudolph, Ana Gasteyer and Rachel Dratch.
The show’s creator-producer, Lorne Michaels, admits the Facebook campaign “took on a groundswell.”
“[White as the host] isn’t something we would have said no to, [but the campaign] validated that, ‘Oh, that’d be fun’ … It was the outpouring of affection from fans, and we feel the same way,” Michaels added.
The Emmy-winning actress broke the news earlier this week at the 18th Annual Elton John AIDS Foundation Academy Award Viewing Party, but has remained tight-lipped on the full details of her appearance.
While she’s hosting the Mother’s Day special, White has not children of her own. Michaels has an answer for any critics, explaining “She’s the mother of us all in comedy.”
The 88-year-old earned big laughs while accepting her SAG Lifetime Achievement award in January. She followed that with a surprise appearance in a Super Bowl commercial for Snickers. Fans quickly took notice and launched the now-famous campaign.
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At long last, the timeless Betty White has confirmed to People Magazine what nearly 500,000 Facebook fans (including me) have rallied for – she will be hosting an upcoming episode of SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE:
When asked by PEOPLE, “Are you doing Saturday Night Live,” she answered, “Yes,” even if she remains perplexed by the groundswell of support.
“I don’t know why or how,” she says, “but it’s been wonderful.”
And with that, we can all say, thank you…for being a friend…

As hilarious as your wheelchair-bound grandmother getting slammed by a runaway bus in a horrendous hit and run, left bleeding in the street, while sewer roaches feast on her innards and pigeons peck at her rotting, lifeless corpse.
You know, just like THE JERSEY SHORE!
I never needed an explanation at the story from years ago that told us of the woman who suffered the MARY HART SYNDROME – I can sympathize, going through my own form of mental gyrations at the sound of her voice. But, who knew that man’s best friends deal with a similar – albeit less painful – predicament during the opening theme to one of my all-time favorite TV shows?
Hasn’t been a stellar year for CDs. Well, rather than blame the output, I’ll blame myself. It hasn’t been a year I’ve spent hunting or gathering or submerging myself in new music. Whereas, in any given year, I’d hear hundreds of new releases, I’ve barely reached the one hundred mark in 2009. And the copious amount of hours spent between my headphones didn’t result in too many glorious moments. Except these. Here are my twenty favorite moments of musical bliss for the year…the beauty…followed by the beasts…
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LA BELLE
1 K’Naan – Troubadour

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2 Amadou & Mariam – Welcome To Mali

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3 Brad Paisley – American Saturday Night

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4 Maxwell – BLACKsummers’night

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5 Leonard Cohen – Live In London

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6 Neko Case – Middle Cyclone

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7 Antony & The Johnsons – The Crying Light

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8 Marianne Faithfull – Easy Come Easy Go

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9 Animal Collective – Merriweather Post Pavilion

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10 Melinda Doolittle – Coming Back To You

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11 Girls – Album

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12 Nirvana – Live At Reading

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13 Willie Nelson & Asleep At The Wheel – Willie and the Wheel

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14 Nellie McKay – Normal As Blueberry Pie: A Tribute To Doris Day

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15 The xx – The xx

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16 Pearl Jam – Backspacer

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17 Miranda Lambert – Revolution

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18 The Dirty Projectors – Bitte Orca

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19 The Avett Brothers – I and Love and You

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20 Mos Def – The Ecstatic

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ET LA BETE…
1 Mariah Carey – Memoirs Of An Imperfect Angel

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2 Bon Jovi – The Circle

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3 Rob Thomas – Cradlesong

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4 Chris Cornell – Scream

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5 Eminem – Relapse

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6 Rascal Flatts – Greataest Hits Volume 1

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7 Chris Brown – Graffiti

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8 Asher Roth – Asleep In The Bread Aisle

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9 U2 – No Line On The Horizon

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10 Timbaland – Shock Value 2

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Hopefully it’s not too much to ask for a better 2010~
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A peculiar thing happened as I sat down to write the list of my favorite films of the decade. I first thought to pick 10, but that wouldn’t do. Then I listed 15. Nope. 20? Uh uh. I couldn’t stop. As someone who could stream-of-consciously pontificate ad nauseum, I finally disciplined myself to halt at 25 (…or so). And since that was frustrating enough, I realized to list them in order of preference would clearly be more of an arduous task, so I figured, screw that. Let me take the easy way out and list them alphabetically. You know, the easy way out.
Now, that’s not to say I don’t have one particular favorite – I didn’t need a proverbial gun pointed at my head and told “Pick one, boy, or imma gon’ shoot you” to state that PAN’S LABYRINTH, without hesitation, is it. No film has haunted me more, both visually and viscerally, than Guillermo Del Toro’s fantasy. It’s one of the most remarkable films of all time. That was the easy part. But what’s a wannabe critic to do?
At first, I wasn’t going to boast such lofty platitudes as to state “I’m a critic,” but then realized, “Hey! I guess I am!” But really, who isn’t? If you have an opinion, or some basic knowledge of craft, you are a critic (what I am not is a film expert). Film, like music and all arts, is a personal experience, and opinion is individualistic, and what effects/affects one’s soul might alter over time and differ from the friend who sits next to you.
It’s strange cataloging such a vast amount of cinematic experiences for a whole 10-year span when you consider I haven’t even chosen a Best of 2009 list yet. I haven’t finished watching some end-of-year releases. And while I’m looking forward to the unseen, I can’t fathom that any of them could live up to the two revelatory experiences that I did see in 2009 that join this “decade favorite” shortlist – the glorious UP, and Kathryn Bigelow’s THE HURT LOCKER. The former joins the Pixar Parthenon (whose first 11 minutes alone – which include a four-minute soliloquy quietly detailing a love affair from the genesis at childhood to marriage to old age to the inevitable – are some of the most joyful and heartrending moments ever put on-screen and are proof enough of its addition here), while the latter should finally eliminate the Academy’s long-standing history of misogyny; in over eight decades, only three other women have ever been nominated for a Best Director Oscar (Lina Wertmuller in 1976 for SEVEN BEAUTIES, Jane Campion in 1993 for THE PIANO and only a few years ago, Sofia Coppola for 2003s LOST IN TRANSLATION) with no wins. After deservedly bestowed with just about any and every critics award for Best Film and Best Director, that long-festering Oscar scar should be healed and the award should go to Bigelow. And she’ll deserve it.
One thing I noticed while compiling my favorites was how similar my list was in comparison to many other published lists. Though I don’t remember Spike Lee’s great 25TH HOUR receiving that many rave reviews upon initial release (which at that time I found curious – when I saw the film I immediately elevated it to Lee’s high echelon of masterpieces alongside DO THE RIGHT THING and MALCOLM X), I’m happy that here, at the end of a decade, the film makes multiple showings on various Top 10s. Better late than never, I surmise. Other notables were expected (e.g. NO COUNTRY FOR OLD MEN, PAN, ETERNAL SUNSHINE) while others’ inclusions I was happily surprised with (who knew so many admired MINORITY REPORT, A.I. and David Fincher’s greatest film, ZODIAC as much as I did?). Others made my list that I couldn’t find on anyone else’s with a fine-tooth comb, accolades notwithstanding (THE DESCENT – the scariest horror film of the decade, and IN THE BEDROOM, a master class in acting by its cast). See, art is subjective.
On most ‘best’ lists that you’ll read is David Lynch’s MULHOLLAND DRIVE. I’m usually allergic to Lynch’s trash-pretending-to-be-art oeuvres (most notably the dubiously honored yet detestable BLUE VELVET and WILD AT HEART), and after viewing this confounded curiosity back in 2001, my feelings hadn’t changed. Perhaps a second viewing is in order to at least try to understand the trifecta of critical, hipster and geek appeal. Or maybe I have better things to do…
A major exclusion on my list (but whose inclusion on most critics lists is not so startling) is Martin Scorcese’s THE DEPARTED. Scorcese’s remake of Alan Mak and Andrew Lau’s 2004 INFERNAL AFFAIRS told a solid story, sure, and his direction is flawless, which we could/should always expect from aguably the greatest director alive. But I could not get past the embarrassingly cringe-inducing Jack Nicholson performance. If it’s true that he’s played The Joker for about 20 years now in one form or another in every film since Tim Burton’s gorgeous-looking yet sterile BATMAN (and it IS true, since I’m the one who said it), then his Frank Costello was a compendium of every one of those over-the-top performances he’s given since that film – and for a great actor who has (mostly) coasted on his legend rather than his art these past 2 decades, that’s saying a lot (Oscar be damned, AS GOOD AS IT GETS was pure Lifetime Movie Of The Week. And if you mention THE BUCKET LIST I will get violent). THE DEPARTED is not Scorcese’s best – though certainly not a clunker, but I can’t help but feel his Best Director Oscar was a consolation prize for the multiple he should have won for a lifetime of masterful movie-making (who can deny that he was robbed for TAXI DRIVER, GOODFELLAS, or RAGING BULL?).
As I’ve written, I could have continued the list with another 25+ titles but with PAN’S LABYRINTH as my favorite film of the past 10 years, the proceeding, alphabetized 25 (…or so) could be listed in any sequence. Without agenda, or really much of a formula in my decision-making process, these are the films I gravitated toward more and more, and those which left an indelible heart-print on some subconscious or conscious level. I won’t say these are the “best” films of the decade (I’m not always comfortable making such proclamations) but they are my favorites. I also won’t be so audacious to claim that my favorites are any better (or not) than yours.
Remember, art is subjective.
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25th Hour (dir. Spike Lee 2002)
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A.I. (dir. Steven Spielberg 2001)
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Almost Famous (dir. Cameron Crowe 2000)
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Brokeback Mountain (dir. Ang Lee 2005)
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Children of Men (dir. Alfonso Cuarón 2006)
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City Of God (dirs. Fernando Meirelles & Katia Lund 2002)
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The Descent (dir. Neil Maarshall 2005)
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The Diving Bell And Butterfly (dir. Julian Schnabel 2007)
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Eternal Sunshine Of The Spotless Mind (dir. Michel Gondry 2004)
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The Hurt Locker (dir. Kathryn Bigelow 2008)
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In The Bedroom (dir. Todd Field 2001)
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The Incredibles (dir. Brad Bird 2004)
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Kill Bill Vol I & II (dir. Quentin Tarantino 2003/4) (I’m counting as one – so sue me – and someone on YouTube was smart enough to mash-up the two trailers)
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The Lives Of Others (dir. Florian Henckel von Donnersmarck 2006)
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Million Dollar Baby (dir. Clint Eastwood 2004)
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Minority Report (dir. Steven Spielberg 2002)
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No Country For Old Men (dirs. Joen & Ethan Coen 2007)
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Once (dir. John Carney 2006)
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Ratatouille (dirs. Brad Bird & Jan Pinkava 2007)
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Spirited Away (dir. Hayao Miyazaki 2001)
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There Will Be Blood (dir. Paul Thoman Anderson 2007)
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Up (dirs. Pete Docter & Bob Peterson 2009)
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Wall-E (dir. Andrew Stanton 2008)
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Y Tu Mamá También (dir. Alfonso Cuarón 2001)
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Zodiac (dir. David Fincher 2007)
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A quick P.S. if you will…
There are pangs of guilt for leaving off other favorites that I’ve loved over the years, like the brilliant Romanian 4 MONTHS, 3 WEEKS, AND 2 DAYS (2007) by director Cristian Mungiu, Todd Haynes’ astonishing Douglas Sirkian homage FAR FROM HEAVEN (2002), Gus Van Sant’s great 2008 biography of Harvey MILK, the best “monster movie” of the decade, Joo-ho Bong’s great THE HOST, Richard Linklater’s magical 2004 sequel BEFORE SUNSET, Ang Lee’s exhilarating 2000 martial arts epic CROUCHING TIGER, HIDDEN DRAGON or Miranda July’s 2005 masterwork ME AND YOU AND EVERYONE WE KNOW. So let it suffice to say – all worthy.
And this is not to mention the acclaimed films I never even watched these past years that made many critics lists, including ADAPTATION, LOST IN TRANSLATION, GOSFORD PARK, SIDEWAYS, THE CLASS, CACHE. If you ask me the reasoning behind my flippancy for these much-discussed, mostly applauded works, I won’t have a satisfying reply.
Reality (and logic…and truth…and common sense) gives Creationism a bad name.
***That persnickety genius John Lennon was a very spiritual (religious?) man, which goes to show that just because you’re one of the greatest songwriters in history doesn’t automatically mean you’re always the smartest…

…Jeffrey wishes you a VERY MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!! HAPPY KWANZAA!!! FELIZ NAVIDAD!!!! HAPPY HOLIDAYS!!!!! Whatever your religious or non-religious affiliations, whichever your spiritual or secular proclivities…it is a time of love and retrospect and soul-searching.
On this 12th day of (Jeffrey)Christ-mas, I give to you my favorite non-traditional Christmas song of them all, a surreal, haunting meeting of two great singers from two disparate generations singing about something so universal.
And what better memo for mankind during the holidays – especially while living in these hellish economic days – than the basic message of “Little Drummer Boy”? Consumerism has ruled – thus nearly ruined – the holidays for eons, and everyone’s inherent knee-jerk obligation is to spend money to exhibit their devotion for their loved ones…charging credit cards, racking up bills, emptying wallets, the worry that it’s never enough, or the fear that begets guilt that the receiver won’t like it. It’s maddening, really. Life shouldn’t be that hard-pressed.
But one needn’t spelunk their dwindling pockets to showcase their declarations. All one really needs to show how they feel about those they love is to play their own drum.
And “Peace On Earth” is a glorious counterpoint…
Peace on Earth, can it be
Years from now, perhaps we’ll see
See the day of glory
See the day, when men of good will
Live in peace, live in peace again
Every child must be made aware
Every child must be made to care
Care enough for his fellow man
To give all the love that he canPeace on Earth, can it be
I pray my wish will come true
For my child and your child too
He’ll see the day of glory
See the day when men of good will
Live in peace, live in peace again
Perchance life can’t be simplified in such idealistic terms, I know. Perhaps “Peace On Earth/Little Drummer Boy” speaks the words of a naive person who wishes to see the world thrive in peace, and love to rule humanity. Perhaps.
Sadly, it isn’t love that makes the world go round – it is money, greed, hatred, intolerance.
But sometimes the simplest of expressions are words to live by…and hope is a dream we can’t afford to lose.
Peace? Love? Perhaps, one day…
Perhaps. One day…

…Jeffrey gave to you…Stevie Nicks’ version of “Silent Night”…
“Twas the night before Christmas, when all through Stevie’s house, not a Gypsy was stirring…”
Stevie’s haunting reading of “Silent Night” was recorded for the A VERY SPECIAL CHRISTMAS charity album in 1987, the first (and the best) in the long line of Christmas albums benefiting the Special Olympics produced by long-time Stevie fan, producer and now chairman of Interscope records, Jimmy Iovine.
AVSC consists of some wonderful holiday tracks (including Eurythmics’ enchanting “Winter Wonderland”, the Pointer Sisters’ jovial “Santa Claus Is Coming To Town” (featured as my 7th Day Of (Jeffrey)Christ-mas), Bruce Springsteen’s fantastic “Merry Christmas, Baby” and Run-DMC’s classic “Christmas In Hollis”, accompanied by an even better VIDEO), and needless to say to anyone who knows me – at all – the Stevie Nicks reading of “Silent Night” is amongst my very favorite Christmas recordings.
Below is a video I put together called “Silent Night Suite”. It begins with an excerpt of an old MTV special about the making of the album (which includes an interview with Stevie and Iovine), and then the full Iovine interview where that footage was taken from. To, of course, the sterling live version.
With two-maybe-three hit wonder Robbie Nevil lending his vocal, this version of “Silent Night” was performed on the “A Very Special Christmas” concert TV special that aired on CBS in 1987. Hosted by FAME actress Nia Peeples, it featured some of the album’s artists performing their tracks. The show closed with “Silent Night”. When Stevie sings with her long-time backup singers Lori Perry-Nicks and Sharon Celani, the result is always stunningly ethereal, and here is no exception…blending with Robbie’s call-and-response, this live version is actually more exquisite than the recorded version, and sweeps you away into another dimension.
Open your eyes, and you see a Rock ‘N Roll queen sing in celebration. Close your eyes and you are encompassed by the beauty of the song, the luxurious harmony, and the spirit of the holidays.

…Jeffrey gave to you…“Oh, Holy Night” by…well, just about anyone, really.
From the most classic voices in history (Mahalia Jackson, Donna Summer, Luciano Pavarotti) to the artists I adore, to those I ordinarily can’t stomach (Celine Dion, Whitney Houston, Mariah Carey), rare is the version of “Oh, Holy Night” that I don’t succumb to (not to get my Scrooge on, but putrid recordings that do come to mind – say, Jessica Simpson’s, Il Divo’s, Danny Gokey’s, Celtic Women’s – are not the norm, but rather musical anomalies better left to the art of sign language).
The song is, in my opinion, not only the most beautiful carol of them all, but one of the greatest melodies ever written, hence one of histories greatest songs. And, lest I am accused of hypocrisy again, I’ll reiterate what I wrote in my 1st Day of (Jeffrey)Christ-mas post:
…some decry or belittle my passion for Christmas and its seasonal tunes – I’m often accused of hypocrisy; “How? You’re an atheist – a non believer!! Blah blah blah!!!” Fair enough (those same town criers say the same because of my love of gospel), but as I alluded earlier, it’s the spirit (yes) but also the ideal of the holiday, and what it should bring out in mankind. It often fails, apparently, but there’s no harm in the yearning. So, I love religious carols too, despite the doctrine.
So, it’s not the lyrical content of “Oh, Holy Night”, but its rapturous melody, and more importantly, the ideal of its dogma. It’s a beautiful thing to believe in such fairytales, and if it makes one human being a more contented soul, then who am I to negate its effect/affect?
It also unearths a wave of emotional stimuli from the core of my very soul. I was honored to perform the song back in 1984 during my High School’s annual winter concert (I wrote a little about that same night HERE). When the solos were being issued weeks earlier, a lesser voice attempted to acquire it, but Dr. Morris wouldn’t even entertain that notion. She knew it was my favorite song, yes, but more importantly, and for the better of the show, she knew – steadfastly and adamantly – that not a single body in the entire school would be able to resonate on this canticle as I would…she knew my voice better than even I understood and there wasn’t a scintilla of a second thought in her decision that I would sing this solo.
So, come showtime, with the chorus as my own personal backup choir, I took to the stage…in my Harley Davidson MC boots, my Rock ‘N Roll hair, my 80s pornstache, and dressed as a nearly-clean shaven Santa (I had, at this point, removed the fake white beard), I stood before the packed auditorium and sang out to the masses. And it was magical…my voice, like a clarion, singing in the night as my classmates wept, and the audience roared to a thunderous standing ovation, and as I glanced over to a teary-eyed Dr. Morris I knew then that it was, undoubtedly, a highlight of my High School “career”. (Update – As my brother Sean reminded me, the powers that be made me change “Christ” to “He”, as in “Oh night, when HE was born..” I had forgotten that bit of history. Thanks, Sean!)
I don’t write these words as a man putting his ego to pen, or as a braggart seeped in self-aggrandizement. I write these words merely as an emblem of a simpler time…and of the influence that the song had in my life.
I was recently bestowed a gift from a friend and a genuine celebrity. Back in October, my friend Jim Cantiello, for an MTV News piece, was interviewing David Archuleta of “American Idol” fame. Jim asked David to go caroling throughout the company to a few people who were fans, and one of those visits was to me. When Jim arrived at my office, David asked which song would I like him to sing and without hesitation I told him that I’ve been listening to his recent holiday release and his version of “Oh Holy Night” so it would be an honor for him to sing that to me. Well, words can’t describe the emotionality of the moment – here was this young man, so humble and authentic, with a voice that rang through my mind like an angel on earth, singing “Oh, Holy Night” to a mere mortal like me, in my dark little cavern of MTV. In a word, celestial! (You can watch Jim and David’s MTV Carol extravaganza HERE)
Feast your ears on these various incarnations of this most heavenly hymn. Believer or non-believer, atheist or a theist, sinner or saint, “Oh, Holy Night” is undeniable.
Patti LaBelle’s transcendent 1990 Johnny Carson performance
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Mahalia Jackson’s definitive version
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The Queen with the Fifth Beatle
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The incomparable Donna Summer from Solid Gold’s Christmas Special
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