Music Box: Out Of The Frying Pan, Into The ARCADE FIRE

Arcade Fire | The Suburbs

*****

They remain one of the few hipster “cult” bands who deserve the (sorta) mainstream success that they’ve (sorta) acquired. But how “cult” is a band, really, when your last two CDs lived at the upper realms of Billboard’s Top 200 album charts? Their 2007 release, NEON BIBLE, debuted and peaked at #2 – and their recent Grammy Winning ALBUM OF THE YEAR release, THE SUBURBS, debuted at the zenith of the charts.

I had a hearty laugh (as I always do at a hipster’s expense) at this video.

Music Box: Adele

*****

Dear America. You can keep your musical trash bags like Ke$ha. You can hold dear your atonal warblers like Rihanna (yeah, yeah, I know she’s from Barbados, but made her mark here in the US as a teen). You want your sterile Country music automatons like Carrie Underwood or your tone-deaf milquetoast Country queens like Taylor Swift? My pleasure – take them, please. Enjoy dodging the melisma of caterwaulers like Christina Aguilera – and, good luck; they’re your ears, not mine.  Want everyday to be a tuneless Thanksgiving day? Revel in your discordant SciFi megatron turkey gobblers like Katy Perry.

That’s right, clueless masses. Continue to misprise breathtaking beauty – seamless, pure vocal talent – an unaffected gift as natural and as ethereal as any we’ve heard in many moons. That’s fine. Let the rest of us have Adele.

After surprisingly – yet elatedly (for those in the know) – being nominated for 4 Grammy Awards in 2009 (and winning Best Female Pop Performance for “Chasing Pavements” and Best New Artist) and another nod in 2010 (for “Hometown Glory”), Adele will release her second album, 21, on February 22. I’ve been absorbed in it since its UK release last month – it’s gorgeous.

Last night, she performed the track “Someone Like You” from 21 at the Brit Awards. Magnificent.

 

Music Box: Born THAT Way


I’ve been known – much to the chagrin of many of my Little Monster friends – to handily and mercilessly knock Lady Gaga at every whim. Perusing online, I’ve come across countless times my exaggerated disgust for her machinations resulted in comments curious of her longevity.  Well, something funny happened during the course of 2010. No, my opinion of her music wasn’t altered much, but my respect for Lady Gaga – as a woman and public figure – took a turn. And, believe it or not, I have Oprah Winfrey to thank for that.

Previously avoiding all print/online/TV things Gaga (I mean, after all, there was nothing this attention whore could possibly invoke that would negate my aversion), I admittedly watched with prejudiced curiosity. What happened was something I didn’t expect.  Here was arguably the most popular entertainer on earth – the most talked about, the most controversial, simultaneously the most maligned and worshiped since the heyday of Madonna’s hierarchy, and there didn’t seem to be a haughty bone in her body. Rarely have I witnessed such humility, such earthiness (I know!), such devotion to fans from a pop star of Gaga’s uber-popularity.  For all the comparison hubbub, here was the antithesis of Madonna.

It was almost an epiphany. Was I allowing my distaste for her glaring attention-seeking shenanigans (and ersatz first few singles) to miss the abutment of performance art and commerce, from a tough New York cookie with a heart of gold? Sure, such combinations aren’t that new. Madonna – minus the heart of gold, natch – explored the art/commerce agenda brilliantly since her “Like A Virgin” performance at the VMAs over two decades ago (most unsuccessfully – in idea and ideal, anyway – during her EROTICA/SEX/BODY OF EVIDENCE debacle). Purely as an entity, I wanna hang out in the East Village with Gaga, smoke some pot, and throw back a few whiskey sours. And I’ve never smoked pot and loathe whiskey. The Power Of Gaga! (Of course, such brazen tangibility just might be a small ingredient in Gaga’s world domination brew…)

One should always let the music speak for itself, of course, and not be deterred one way or the other from outside sources, so I thought, in light of my ‘a-ha!’ Oprah/Gaga moment, that it was my duty to spelunk her debut with a different, less prejudiced mindset.

Sigh.

THE FAME still felt sonically antiquated, overstuffed; a dance neophyte who had yet to pass the audition. True, THE FAME MONSTER (a sorta addendum to THE FAME, and actually released around the world as a ‘deluxe’ edition) proved an infinitely hookier, more psycho-sexualized transgression. That it includes a song for the ages, “Bad Romance” didn’t hurt. But I just couldn’t get over the feeling that I was being (musically, anyway) conned.

Remember, Miss Stefani Joanne Angelina Germanotta wasn’t born Lady Gaga. She started her career as another whiny piano-playing singer/songwriter (never had enough of those in the late 90s early aughts, huh?) playing the night club circuit who, when she got nowhere fast because she sounded like every other angsty girl-with-a-piano, decided to write chintzy dance pop songs we’ve heard a thousand times before, only juxtaposing her aesthete was a concoction of cult figures,  myriads and icons alike. There was more than a mere dash of Dale Bozzio, more than a smidgen of Grace Jones, more than a measly modicum of Leigh Bowery. All gelled together, with a heaping dose of the Material Girl thrown in, she sought to conquer what she most desired – fame – and became victor.

Yeah, yeah, I know – since time immemorial, Rock ‘N Roll’s been populated with “borrowed” musicality. You can hear the history of Muddy Waters in Led Zeppelin’s whole catalogue; you can feel the ectoplasm of early archetypes like Waters, Bo Diddly, Little Richards, etc.  throughout the Rolling Stones’ classic canon.  The sounds of gay, urban, black 70s era R&B and disco saturates the bloodline of Madonna’s 20+ year chartulary. There are shades of music history’s past in every present.

But there’s a fine line between “shades of” and “blatant”.  “Born This Way” is such an elaborate – maybe intentional? – “Express Yourself” sound-alike that I half expect Gaga to move to England and acquire a phony, uncomfortable English accent! Forget melody (too obvious) – even the chord progression is too close for comfort. And, to my ears, there are more that a few tints of TLCs “Waterfalls” in the verse cadence. When, on release day,  I posted on Facebook (and on YouTube) that perhaps it should be renamed “Express Waterfalls”, Gaga’s army went on the attack. That I wasn’t the only one who heard echoes of T-Boz, Chili and Left Eye was little consolation…though I do thank you, YouTube stranger, for this:

Even though he’s using the wrong section of “EY” (it should be the bridge), am I wrong to think Madonna and TLC should reap in royalties?

These accusations aren’t new to Gaga, of course. It was almost a year ago that Gaga faced similar accusations when her controversial video and single for “Alejandro” was released. The song’s/video’s overt similarities (in sound) to Ace of Bace’s “Don’t Turn Around” and (in vision) Madonna (again) were palpable and evident and the blogosphere couldn’t get enough. Every icon has his/her “haters”, true. Gaga’s haters hated, and her minions steadfastly stood by their queen.

One might surmise, not incorrectly, that the “Born This Way” (or “Express Yourself”, for that matter) theme of self-empowerment isn’t exclusive to the LGBT community. Absolutely. But given Gaga’s historical gay alignment, one can’t argue that “gay rights” is at the core – and the genesis – of its central theme (and none of these latest attacks/accusations negates its Hi-NRG exuberance or its surefire gay anthem aesthetics; the clubs will be thud-thud-thudding this along for months to come, straight into and beyond this summer’s gay pride festivities). Its imminent status in the gay rights movement is almost a given.

Sample lyrics:

Don’t be a drag, just be a queen
Whether you’re broke or evergreen
You’re black, white, beige, chola descent
You’re Lebanese, you’re orient
Whether life’s disabilities
Left you outcast, bullied, or teased
Rejoice and love yourself today
‘Cause baby you were born this way

No matter gay, straight, or bi,
Lesbian, transgendered life
I’m on the right track baby
I was born to survive
No matter black, white or beige
Chola or orient made
I’m on the right track baby
I was born to be brave

Hey, no one’s ever accused Gaga of a poetic hierarchy, as these lyrics  hammer-point home. But, while her choice of vernacular and syntax might be confounding (her use of the word “orient” is causing some minor controversy), rarely – probably never – in the history of pop music has someone of her mega-status been so forthright, so adamant, so positive, so universal in a pro-gay (read: human) rights stance.

I won’t proclaim absolute conversion just yet (and as a 45 year old, it would be – or should be – an embarrassment to call myself a “little monster”), but as homogeneous guilty pleasure, it’s hook-laden and damned catchy. More importantly, though, if “Born This Way” influences one disillusioned youngster – downtrodden by the darkest forces and most vile animosity from so-called humanity, terrified of the world that refuses to accept their innateness – if it breaks free the shackles of suicide as a pain-ending finale – then let it ring from the mountain tops and across the globe.

If ever a musical were created on the concept of Dan Savage’s important and groundbreaking It Gets Better project, “Born This Way” should not only be it’s theme song, but it’s mantra.

Idiot Box: Slash & Burn

I know, I know – Rock N Roll squabbles are frivolous in the great spectrum of life. But sometimes supercilious remarks by a musician way past his prime just irks the hell out of me. Case in point: Slash Vs. GLEE.

Seriously.

In a recent interview with ENTERTAINMENT WEEKLY, the former Guns N Roses guitarist Slash was asked about GnR’s catalog being used on the hit Fox TV show (disclaimer – I’m a GLEEK):

How would you feel about GLEE doing a Guns N’ Roses song or themed episode?
Actually, we got asked about that once already but it got turned down. In the current climate of what’s going on in entertainment these days, I try to be more optimistic than negative because it’s really easy to get negative about it, but I draw the line at Glee. Glee is worse than Grease and Grease is bad enough….  When Grease came out I was like, “Oh, c’mon, give me a break.” Actually, I look at Grease now and think: Between High School Musical and Glee, Grease was a brilliant work of art.

Well, you know what I say, Slash? Sure, “to each his own”, as the old cliche goes. But infinitely greater, more fantastical Rock’ N Roll legends than you’ll ever be (e.g. Paul McCartney, Bruce Springsteen, Queen, etc…) understand GLEEs aesthetic and happily loan their songs to this archetypal show (can’t wait for the Springsteen ep!). So, while you continue to prostitute your canon (and yourself) by allowing ‘singers’ like Fergie to use the only guitar refrain you’ll ever be famous for (and for actually partaking), in debacles like The Black Eyed Peas’ abysmal Super Bowl halftime show, I’ll enjoy GLEEs recitals of genuine Rock icons.

Irrelevancy. Such a motherfucker, huh, Slash?

*****

Here, Puck serenades his latest conquest Lauren naively inappropriately with Queen’s “Fat Bottom Girls” (from their 1978 album JAZZ***):

And here, the Warblers – featuring the delicious Darren Criss as Blaine – serenades Chris’ former New Direction mates with Paul McCartney & Wings’ “Silly Love Songs”***:

***Yes, the videos are flipped. Many YouTube posters encode their vids this way so YouTube’s recognition technology can’t recognize the material…

Music Box: The Star Spangled Blunder

 

So much hullabaloo online today regarding Christina Aguilera’s Super Bowl rendition of “The Star Spangled Banner”. You’da thunk she gave the middle finger to the President or took a shit on the Constitution (what, she’s not a Tea Bagger or the previous President’s administration!). As someone who loathes Aguilera’s usual sonic assault on the senses, I still must ask, who the fuck cares that she flubbed one line of the National Anthem? That this transcendentally awful song is our anthem to begin with should be the real discussion (I’m forever in the “America, The Beautiful” camp, even with its allusion to a god). In any case, Whitney Houston – for all the adoration that’s heaped upon her  powerful yet soulless rendition – lip-synched it back in 91. As did Jennifer Hudson 2 years ago. And far better singers than Aguilera will ever be have blundered the song as well. At least Aguilera sang (shrilled) live. Let’s give her that.

 

 

Me? I appreciated her lyrical mishap. Heavens forbid, if all went well, we would have been subjected to Aguilera’s melismatic norm. Something akin to, well, this: