Music Box: On The 5th Day Of (Jeffrey)Christ-mas…
…Jeffrey gives to you…FIVE…TORI…VIDS!!!! (In case you didn’t get it, that should be sung out like Day 5 of the original “12 Days Of Christmas“. I’m telling you, Christmastime brings out the sap in me!)
I can hear the distant wails of the my fanatical Tori-lovin’ friends from afar, who have pointlessly attempted and failed to convert my early Amos detachment, howling at the moon in disbelief.
You see, I’m not one of those who bow at the altar of Amos. After a stunning solo debut, LITTLE EARTHQUAKES (the genesis of the often accused Kate Bush artifice she can’t seem to live down), followed by the unjustified critical drubbing of the CRUCIFY EP (which consisted of startling, gorgeous takes on the Stones’ “Angie”, Nirvana’s “Smells Like Teen Spirit”, and a heart-rendering reading of Zeppelin’s “Thank You”; ironically, her next semi-solid album came a decade later with the 2001 release of another covers assemblage, STRANGE LITTLE GIRLS CD), Tori proceeded to release one cockamamie, nonsensical piece of mooncalf pie after another, each one more ridiculously esoteric then the last. The empress had no clothes. You can’t convince the cavalcade of Toriphiles of this, though, as they will fight you to the edge of Venus for their Queen. Me? I can’t relate to the gobbledygook of her pen.
But leave it to the kooky Queen of Cornflakes to release her only wholly listenable collection since LITTLE EARTHQUAKES as a holiday album! On the elegantly titled MIDWINTER GRACES, Tori reworks seasonal standards by incorporating her own baroque touches, harkening back musically to the sweep of her earlier work, and singing solidly for the first time in as many years. Also, she authored some pretty gorgeous yuletide pieces of her own, including the poignant “Snow Angel”, the pagan Yule “Winter’s Carol”, and the delightfully accessible “A Silent Night With You”, one of the most luxurious original holiday songs in years and one, I’ll bet, that will be covered innumerable times. It’s a new seasonal classic, and it’s the one I wanted to feature for its splendor:
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The collection as a whole is such an ethereal piece of work that I wanted to post 4 other tracks and decided on fan-made vids I found on YouTube (“4″ others because of that whole quirky “FIVE TORI VIDS!!” refrain at the start of this post. Did I already mention that Christmastime brings out the sap in me?). These vids showcase how far a fan will go to visualize a Tori Amos work. Marrying image to song could be tricky and more-often-than-not rarely work (just watch the bulk of professionally made music videos to see what I mean) but a few of these are enchanting to watch, even at their most artlessness.
“What Child, Nowell”
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“Winter’s Carol” (Visually, merely a still of her album cover. Sonically, one of the most divine tracks on the CD)
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“Snow Angel” (Like a video version of a beloved snow globe…)
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“A Silent Night With You” (I’m cheating here, I know, because I’m repeating myself. This is not really a “4th other” song from the album. But, it’s my favorite on the collection, and it’s also my favorite fan-made vid. I didn’t post this above because I didn’t want to distract from the actual song, but now that you’ve heard it, this is a magical amalgamation of Amos’ ballad with clips of Tim Burton’s marvelous “The Nightmare Before Christmas”…
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Clichés are cliché for a reason – because they’re borne of truth, and believe this cliché - MIDWINTER GRACES is a must-have collection that you will replay every holiday for years to come.
Somewhere, Scott Batchelor is smiling.
Music Box: On the 4th Day Of (Jeffrey)Christ-mas…
Dr. Andrea Morris Accompanies The 1984-1985 F.D.R. Chorus On "Carol of the Bells"
…Jeffrey gives to you… “Carol of the Bells”!
One of my fondest memories of High School was our annual winter concert. As the lead tenor in the Franklin Delano Roosevelt High School Chorus, in Brooklyn NY, the most exciting night of my winter was our annual seasonal concert. Led by the glorious Dr. Andrea Morris, the head of the music department and our fearless choral leader, we were quite…well, mediocre. There was little interest in performing live for most of the miscreants of the class, but the few of us who thrived live bandied together and made sure that it felt like it was the night of all of our lives. And it was.
One of the songs we sang was Mykola Dmytrovych Leontovych’s “Shchedryk”, which was later adapted to English as “Carol Of The Bells”. Or as some people know it, “Hark how the bells, sweet silver bells…”
It’s an exhilarating emotion to sing a cappella, but due to the limits of the actual vocal finesse of the majority of our choral members, who couldn’t differentiate harmony from melody, Dr. Morris wisely decided to accompany us on piano for most of the numbers, including the wondrous “Carol…”, to masquerade any musical infidelity we (they) might have proposed.
Just to remind you, this was 1985 and school shows were rarely, if ever, videotaped for prosperity. Part of me would be awestruck to be able to relive such momentous heartprints of our youths, to watch part of the very thing that helped mold us into the grown-ups so many of us still strive to be. So, sadly, there is no 1984-1985 F.D.R. Chorus recording.
There have been popular readings of this (most notably by the overblown, pretentious Manheim Steamroller, not to be confused with the equally atrophying Trans-Siberian Orchestra, or the soul-free, droning Celtic Women) but my favorite by far is by the successful, enchanting a cappella group called Straight No Chaser. Weaving in and out of the intricate melody are their voices in majestic harmony, simultaneously lilting and haunting, powerful and prodigious. No other interpretation is more sweepingly simplistic.
Here’s a live performance, recorded by an audience member, from a concert from a few weeks ago:
Or you can listen to the track here, from their wonderful holiday collection HOLIDAY SPIRITS:
Music Box: On The 3rd Day Of (Jeffrey)Christ-mas…
…Jeffrey gives to you…Bob Dylan’s “Must Be Santa”! BOB DYLAN?!?! Yep. Dylan. The bard of ages. The poet laureate of the past 4 decades. Yes. That Dylan.
At first listen, Dylan’s first venture into seasonal music might appear disconcerting, as if you’re not sure his interpretation of hymnals as disparate (for him) as “Little Drummer Boy”, “Oh, Little Town Of Bethlehem” and the ilk is a middle finger-in-cheek to the traditionalists who he had to know he’d piss off for the sheer audacity. But spelunking the negative reviews online, one has to laugh – it’s as if this is the first time they heard Dylan sing. Non-Dylan fans have always disparaged his voice; CHRISTMAS IN THE HEART is perfect fodder for them. For the rest of us who love Dylan, it’s as cozy, comfortable and warm as roasting chestnuts on an open fire with your favorite grandpa…snockered on too much eggnog, but endearing and heartfelt enough.
Even for Dylan’s worshippers, initially hearing the CD was uneasy. As a carol lover, I couldn’t imagine hearing Dylan’s aged croak (which of course is superlative within his own work) singing some of my favorite holiday tunes. But then something happened. I listened to it again. Then again. And I realized that there wasn’t a smidgen of cheekiness, not a dash of a smirk, nor a soupcon of irony. Here was a man who appeared passionate about this latest endeavor – whether it’s the yearning of “I’ll Be Home For Christmas” or the jocular “Christmas Island”, I can’t recall the last time his reading of others’ work were sung with such honesty, wit and melancholia juxtaposed with shameless joviality. CHRISTMAS IN THE HEART is not for everyone. Some will hate it, and it’s definitely not the tool to convert a non-practicing Dylanite. You can consider it a sorta 30-year happy conclusion to his artistically sterile “born-again Christian” albums SLOW TRAIN COMING, SAVED and the dreadful SHOT OF LOVE .
Also, kudos to Dylan for his charity - all proceeds from the sale of the CHRISTMAS IN THE HEART go to the Feeding America foundation to end hunger. So, Merry Christmas, indeed…
I admit I’ve never heard “Must Be Santa” before Dylan’s cover, but already it’s becoming one of my favorite seasonal jams, my life-long antipathy for Polka notwithstanding. Watching the frenzied, exuberant nonsensical video, which could be an unknowing homage to Albert Finney’s “Thank You Very Much” from the musical “Scrooge”, only enhances the sonic pleasures of the track.
Music Box: On The 2nd Day Of (Jeffrey)Christ-mas…
- The Christian ~ D’Onofrio Residence, December 2008
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…Jeffrey gives to you…something he, himself, is totally bamboozled by – Mariah Carey’s “Hark! The Herald Angels Sing/Gloria (In Excelsis Deo)”.
It’s a personal opinion, of course (and for years I was in the minority, though not so much anymore), but there hasn’t been a listenable album in the whole of Mariah Carey’s archives – she morphed from Mrs. Tommy Motolla’s conservatively-clad fembot with a piercing, wheezing voice millions mistook for a prodigious range, to a scantily clad hip-hip earwig, selling her breast implants and porn tics to the masses with nary a memorable hook in earshot (I re-christened her curiously heralded ”comeback” THE EMANCIPATION OF MIMI as THE ATTACK OF THE SCREAMING MIMI).
It’s actually no real surprise that the only memorable CD in her catalogue is her wonderful MERRY CHRISTMAS anthology, released back in 1994 while still under the influence of her Svengali husband. If nothing else, Motolla kept Carey’s public image thwarted of the overt sexual histrionics (not that sexuality is a negative, of course) that would plague her post-divorce output. MERRY CHRISTMAS is chock full of exhilarating holiday staples and wondrous originals; her composition “All I Want For Christmas Is You” stands tall with the most ineradicable holiday classics and was going to be my (Jeffrey)Christ-mas Day 2 selection.
But the one track I am continually drawn back to – hence its inclusion here – is her interpretation of “Hark!” which is, in a word, magnificent. She doesn’t allow the self-infatuation with her own voice to negate the beauty of the arrangement, instead allowing it to be the vessel for the song’s exquisite simplicity. The song ends when it should, with no typical Careyisms, no vocal acrobatics, no diversion from the melody to belabor her usual solipsism. MERRY CHRISTMAS is a treasure trove, and “Hark…” one of its most shimmering pieces.
Music Box: The 12 Days Of (Jeffrey)Christ-mas
Another year, another Christmas. My feeling about the holidays always border on mercurial. Mostly, I bask in the beauty of the spirit, but there are those moments in time when I could feel the soul of Ebenezer creep in. Such is human nature, I surmise, but more often than not, I love the spirit that ’tis the season and find myself bathed in its emotional pull.
Okay, I’ll admit it. When it comes to the holiday and holiday music, I’m a big fat sap.
Which, as a logician, and thus a non-believer, puts me in an odd situation. Some decry or belittle my passion for Christmas and its seasonal tunes – I’m often accused of hypocrisy; “How? You’re an atheist – a non believer!! Blah blah blah!!!” Fair enough (those same town criers say the same because of my love of gospel), but as I alluded earlier, it’s the spirit (yes) but also the ideal of the holiday, and what it should bring out in mankind. It often fails, apparently, but there’s no harm in the yearning. So, I love religious carols too, despite the doctrine. Oh well, it is what it is.
Which brings me here. Because of my unabashed joy of the season, I decided to bring to you these next 2 weeks the 12 Days of (Jeffrey)Christ-mas…a fête, if you will, of some of my favorite carols and canticles, religious and secular, holly and jolly, happy and bittersweet. Now, these selections are not always sung by the most obvious of artists, and not necessarily performed by household names, and a few might or might not be standards, while others have been played to death.
But all hold a special place in my soul – and that is the common denominator.
As a footnote, I will say this – I could easily have written the 20 Days of (Jeffrey)Christ-mas, or even the 30 Days of (Jeffrey)Christ-mas. There are literally hundreds of other songs I could have posted and the aesthete would have been the same.
Happy holidays to you all, believers and non-believers alike.
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On the First Day of Christmas, Jeffrey gave to you…Darlene Love singing “Christmas Baby (Please Come Home)” live from last year’s David Letterman appearance. It’s been a tradition for many years – Letterman invites Love on his show to perform this seminal seasonal classic from what is arguably (or inarguably, if you ask me) the greatest Christmas CD of them all, A CHRISTMAS GIFT TO YOU FROM PHIL SPECTOR. Forget U2s smarmy version (Bono? Smarmy? Noooo!!), the Love original – or any live performance thereof – are the only readings of this song you’ll ever need to hear.
Her canon is rich with some of the most indelible Rock and Roll classics, and her voice has held up better than most women half her age – the most amazing thing about Love is that year after year she never loses her innate joy in her recitals and you realize that the thrill isn’t only in our listening. Like the song, Love remains eternal…
We Interrupt Our Regular My New Boyfriend Postings For A Special Holiday Message
Sick of the Christmas music that has permeated the airwaves like a cancer since Thanksgiving? Too bad – here’s my Christmas gift to you – some of my favorite holiday tunes (or at least the ones that have accompanying visuals). So, sit back, eat some more, and enjoy!
The Queen of Rock N Roll does “Silent Night” with two-hit wonder Robbie Nevil~
The legendary Kate Bush’s haunting Christmas composition~
One of the great voices in Pop music history singing my favorite Christmas song~
One of the great love songs of the 80s…seriously. While the song has nothing to do with Christmas, it has since become a holiday staple due to its rather traditionalist video~
Bruce, from the Conan show~
You could have chosen any Darlene Love/Letterman appearance (the woman still has near-flawless pipes!), so I randomly selected 2006s~
Christmas + Tom Waits + A Hooker In Minneapolis = Holiday Gold~
A great Run-DMC track from “A Very Special Christmas”~
David Bowie + Bing Crosby? ‘Nuff said~
A Blues Christmas message from Charles Brown~
Bing Crosby and Frank Sinatra~
A rather grim disposition, but a great song nevertheless~
A lovely performance~
Judy, Judy, Judy~
From the only listenable Mariah Carey album ever recorded~
The only positive thing one can surmise about that Jim Carey Grinch film was a new holiday classic~
And, last but not least – THE WORST CHRISTMAS SONG EVER RECORDED, just for the fun of it~
HAPPY HOLIDAYS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
My New Secret Santa III
Something tells me that if I aimed this at a few select people at work, the damned thing would explode (no doubt in a colorful array of song and dance)~
BUY IT BY CLICKING HERE!
